Do you have a problem with online sex?

THE SURVEY OF 7,037 MSNBC.com users also found that nearly two in three did not believe that cybersex "violates a person's marital vows," says survey author Alvin Cooper, director of the San Jose Marital Services and Sexuality Centre in San Jose, Calif., and a staff psychologist at Stanford University.
"People don't realize how big a ‘thing' online sex is," says Cooper, who is also an MSNBC.com Sexploration columnist, pointing out that research has shown that up to 30 percent of the total online population has visited a sexually explicit site. In general, he says, an online sexual activity is defined as the use of the Internet for any activity that involves sexuality, while cybersex is a category that involves sexual stimulation or gratification on the part of the participant.
"Our research shows that online sex is not harmful to the vast majority and can even be helpful — depending on the reason why," he says.
Why indeed? The MSNBC.com click-and-tell survey, believed by Cooper to be the most comprehensive study of online sexuality to date, found that more people list distraction as the No. 1 reason for their dalliances than all other reasons combined.
"Online sexual activities are escapism, a distraction," says 39-year-old survey respondent Susan, whose name was changed to protect her privacy. "It's a safe environment that can be fun and funny. It allows your imagination to run wild from the most lighthearted to the most dark."
However, men (81.5 percent) were much more likely than women (60.3 percent) to report they had engaged in online sex for distraction. Relative to females, males also reported they were significantly more likely to have engaged in online sex as a way to deal with stress.
The survey also found that over 11 percent of men and women said acting out fantasies in private rooms or just letting their imagination run wild while perusing the world of Net erotica drove their online sex travels.

A PERSONAL TALE OF FANTASY
Susan, for example, fondly speaks of engaging in fantasies with her now-deceased fiancй, whom she met online. "We had the most satisfying cybersex of all," she says, recalling their role-playing. "I would pretend to be a princess, he would be a knight in shining armor. It was fun to step out of everyday life and become someone else, another persona."
While only about a small percentage of respondents of either gender said finding dates was the primary reason for their online sexual surfing, Susan says that, being overweight, she found that a great draw; in fact, she almost married two men she met online.
"The online interaction allows others to know you first, before being turned off by a body type," she says. Since her prospective suitors got to know her before seeing a picture, she says, only a few declined to continue their relationship once they did.
The anonymity of the initial experience makes "you more likely to trust, to lower your guard," he says. "People fly to different parts of the country to meet their online ‘dream date' and end up murdered. If you use the Internet to meet other people, you need to compensate by being extra aware."